


You are my home

by DelphineCormiersHips



Category: Tamela, True Blood
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff, Possible smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-12 22:14:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29142813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DelphineCormiersHips/pseuds/DelphineCormiersHips
Summary: Love was never meant to last. Pam couldn’t name a time it ever did when it came to people loving her. And she wasn’t going to so foolishly give her cold dead heart to someone who would grow tired of her eventually. Not if she could help it.As strong willed and reserved as Pam is, as heartless as she seems.. she is the most insecure vampire you will ever meet.
Relationships: Pam and tara, tamela - Relationship
Kudos: 3





	1. Walls

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think, i really love writing them & am definitely going to add to this.

Nausea swirled around inside Tara’s stomach, housing itself there. It was such a surreal feeling as a vampire. She glanced over at Pam from her position behind the bar, as much as Tara wanted to hate her maker, she couldn’t. after all, Pam did more for Tara within a few months than her own mother did in 28 years. Not that the bar was set very high in the first place. However, she was already excelling in a number of areas in comparison to Jessica. Anyone with eyes could see how much Bill neglected Jess. Pam sometimes spoke about how in all her years she had never met a worse maker. But in saying that, Tara felt like Pam put a little too much emphasis on the tough part of ‘tough love’.It was all in good nature, she knew that but it was a little overwhelming at times. 

“And just what do you think you’re doing?” Pam asked in her usual southern drawl, she had vamp sped to the bar the second Tara took her eyes off of her, which was a little startling. She leaned over the bar while eyeing the woman up and down. The edge of the bar only presenting her breasts even more, with the help of her lavender bustier. 

Tara’s head perked up from the bottle of V that for some reason, had her wholehearted attention. Even if it tasted like shit. Her eyes quickly dropped to Pam’s breasts before back up to meet her icy blue stare. “A bitch can’t take a break after working all damn day?” The baby vampire responded as the corner of her lips curled ever so slightly. 

Pam deadpanned but not before she attempted to hold back a smirk when she saw Tara’s eyes helplessly wander a second “Unless that ‘bitch’ doesn’t want to get tips.” 

Tara quirked her brow challengingly as she half shrugged, her palms now resting on the edge of the bar as she leaned in ever so slightly, looking down the blonde who was still leaning against the bar herself. “Depends on the tip.” She responded softly, keeping her eyes on the bright blue orbs in front of her. 

The older Vampire rolled her eyes, breaking their eye-lock so she could admire the way Tara’s tight black singlet hugged her torso. The way her biceps looked as she gripped the bar. “Well, i can be  very generous.” Pam purred softly. 

Her makers words poured out of her mouth like smooth honey and it made heat sink to Tara’s core. Her eyes grew darker as she responded. “Then i might be interested.” She whispered, her lips now curling into a full smirk. 

Pam felt Tara‘s rising arousal through their bond, and it only added to her complex. She knew she barely had to say anything to turn Tara on, and boy did she enjoy it. She rose slightly, so her breasts weren’t flushed against the bar and leaned in close to the baby vampires mocha dusted lips. “Honey, you and i both know you are more than interested.” Before Tara could close the gap, which she did attempt to do. Pam pulled away, a grin forming across her plump lips. “Now get back to work.” She snapped as the smirk fell from her face. Composing her hard exterior. 

“Bitch.” Tara mumbled, taking the cloth off of her shoulder and wiping down the bar, still glaring at Pam who merely winked in response before finding her way back to the small stage with Eric’s throne on it. 

xxxxxxxXXXXXXXxxxxxxxx

Fangtasia had finally calmed down and Ginger was more than happy to take over the end of Tara’s shift. There were a few more hours before dawn, so she set out to look for Pam. 

Expecting to find the blonde in her office, she opened the door and was met with a crying Jessica. Tara had stood in the doorway for a few moments, holding onto the door handle. She had wondered if backing out slowly and quietly shutting the door like she hadn’t just walked in on this bitch having a breakdown was a reasonable option, but then she remembered Jessica would have heard her at the door before she even opened it. And before she could live out that thought, Jessica had already looked up from her knees. 

Crimson was staining her face as she continued to sob. “I-i’m sorry.” She blurted out quietly, wiping under her eyes which only smudge the blood across her pale cheeks. 

Tara nodded and braced herself before finally walking in and shutting the door. She hated emotions and could barely deal with her own let alone someone else’s. A few more moments passed and she realised she hadn’t actually replied to Jessica who was still staring up at her sadly. “Oh- you don’t have to be sorry.” She replied finally, walking over to the redhead who was curled against the wall. Tara plucked a few tissues from Pam’s desk on her way before sitting beside her and handing them to the vampire. 

The redhead silently took the tissues and began wiping her cheeks, her sobbing had subsided gradually with just Tara’s presence alone. “Thank you.” She croaked, not looking up from the blood-stained tissue in her hard. 

“It’s nothing.” Tara replied with a small shrug. 

Jessica shook her head and swallowed the lump in her throat. “No,” she started. “I mean like, for everything.” There was a short silence as she tried to stop herself from breaking out into another series of sobs. “y’know, for bein’ my friend and all.” 

The ebony vampire nodded along slowly, awkwardly picking at the skin around her fingernails. She realised Jessica was just really lonely, and she didn’t blame her. She didn’t really have anyone right now, aside from herself. Tara was lucky to have Pam, but Jess really didn’t have anyone. Not even her maker, the one person bound to her for eternity. Tara shivered at the thought of how empty and lonely that must truly feel. 

“And for teaching me things... Bill doesn’t” Jessica cut herself off, covering her face with her hands as she took a few unnecessary breaths. “He don’t teach me much, in fact.. he doesn’t do a lot of anything.” She waved it off as blood began to well along her waterline again. 

Tara looked over at her friend and offered her a small slightly forced smile. “Fuck Bill Compton.” She offered half sarcastically. Truth be told she didn’t really like Bill, not that she could name someone aside from Sookie and sort of Jessica that really liked him at all. 

Jess let out a small breathy chuckle, nodding to Tara. “Right?” She replied breathily. 

The door the office opened causally, interrupting them. Pam rolled her eyes at the sight of Jessica, who looked a mess curled up against her wall. And her helpless progeny tucked neatly beside her. She would be lying if it didn’t ignite a small pang of jealousy inside her. Seeing them so close, so vulnerable. She wanted that Tara, but at the same time the mere thought of being so vulnerable made her stomach churn. 

There was an awkward silence, the air felt suddenly thick. “Oh- god Pam.” Jess blurted rushing to her feet wobbly. “I’m sorry. I hope- i didn’t mean to intrude.” She added wearily, fumbling over her words awkwardly. 

Pam groaned inwardly as she glared at the redhead a few more moments. “Listen fire-crotch i would ask why you’ve decided to have your apparently now weekly breakdown in the likes of  _my_ office, with  _my_ progeny.. but you and i both know that i simply do not care and pretending i do would make an ass out of the both of us.” She drawled calmly, striding over to her desk. 

Both baby vampires were now standing. Jess was hurt by Pam’s words, but she wasn’t surprised. “U-um.” she looked around awkwardly before thanking Tara and leaving. 

Pam didn’t even acknowledge Tara, she sat in her chair and opened the desk drawer, flipping through some papers. 

It was uncomfortable to say the least, Tara approached the desk with caution. She could feel a bit of Pam’s jealousy through their bond, as well as this indescribable faint sadness. “Everythin’ okay?” She asked quietly. 

Usually she didn’t have a lot to say when it came to how someone else was feeling, but she had grown to care very deeply for Pam. And the words usually managed to find her, so to speak. Both of them slowly peeling back each other’s layers. They found themselves to be comfortable in a completely different way with each other than they could with, well, anybody else. When Pam was rebuilding her walls. 

Pam shut the drawer to her desk abruptly, looking up at Tara who was now leaning against her desk. “Just peachy.” 

The ebony vampire furrowed her brows slightly before shaking her head. Pam was always so cut and dry when it came to expressing emotion,  almost all the time. But she could only bottle up so much, until she blew. 

Tara wasn’t sure how to proceed, she knew Pam wasn’t being honest and she knew not to push her. But she wanted to help. “You’d tell me otherwise, right?” She questioned quietly, tentatively placing a reassuring hand on her makers shoulder. She gave it a gentle squeeze and watched as Pam kept her eyes on Tara. 

There was a brief moment where it looked like Pam was going to say something but then she just forced a half-hearted smile and nodded, much to Tara’s disappointment. 

She decided for now to change topics, maybe Pam just wasn’t ready to talk about what was happening inside her. “Have you eaten?” Tara questioned, moving her hand to run her fingers through the blonde ponytail. 

Pam waved her off, twisting slightly so her hair fell from Tara’s hands. “You’re not my fuckin’ mother.” She snapped bitterly, suddenly drawing her attention to the paperwork in front of her. She always pushed Tara away when she felt herself falling, it scared her. These emotions were... well, terrifying. 

Love was never meant to last. She couldn’t name a time it ever did, when it came to people loving her. And she wasn’t going to so foolishly give her cold dead heart to someone who would grow tired of her eventually. 

She was saving herself unnecessary pain, she was saving them  both  unnecessary pain. At least that’s what she was trying to tell herself. 

Tara chewed her inner lip but quickly composed herself.  _Maybe i was being pushy_ , she thought to herself. “I didn’t mean-“ 

Pam cut her off, sitting down the documents that they both knew she wasn’t reading. But she didn’t look at Tara, she couldn’t. She knew that if she did, she wouldn’t be able to say what she was about to say. “You should leave, i’m very busy.” She said dryly, her southern accent thick. 

The baby vampire scoffed, folding her arms. That one hurt. That one hurt a lot. “You’ve got to be fuckin’ kidding me, Pam.” She retorted. 

But Pam didn’t reply, she couldn’t. 

“Y’know what, Jess complains about Bill all the time but at least he doesn’t lead her on one minute and fuck her off the next!” Tara raised her voice, storming over to the door. 

Pam felt her heart sink. Something she hadn’t felt in years. But she remained calm, at least on the outside. Tara’s words were cutting her up on the inside. “Maybe you two can braid each other’s hair and bond over your horrible makers.” Pam retorted sharply, looking anywhere but at Tara. 

Crimson tears fell from Tara’s eyes. “Fuck you.” She said breathlessly before slamming the door on the way out. 

Pam exhaled an unnecessary breath before leaning back in her seat and staring at the door to her office. Blood began to threaten her waterline as she let the weight of what just happened fall on her. She closed her end of the bond as much as she possibly could, she didn’t want Tara to feel her emotions, even if she could feel Tara breaking down in the basement. 


	2. Don’t leave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After seeking outsider advice, can they work it out?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I almost wasn’t going to post this chapter but here we are. The next one will be out soon. Stay tuned!

The air in the office was still, it was eerily quiet when Pam awoke. She glanced at the clock on her wall and realised that she had overslept. 

She fell asleep in her office, she didn’t feel it was right to be in the basement when Tara had cried herself to sleep because of her. Not that she would care if it were anyone else. 

Regret washed over Pam as truly let the events of yesterday sink in. She hated the more she started to feel as the days went by. Tara brought out a side to her that she had since only reserved for Eric, and even then.. he didn’t see it to this extent. “ _Fuckin_ ’ feelings.” she muttered as she sat up, a small groan escaping her lips as a small pain spread in her lower back. She had the worst sleep on this stupid sofa. 

Fangtasia was closed today, which gave Pam a lot of time to restock and place orders. She vamp sped around quickly, sorting through clothes in the basement to change into. 

xxxxxxxxXXXXXXXXxxxxxxx

There were so many emotions swirling around inside Tara, she couldn’t sit still. 

She made her way to bon temps, more specifically straight to merlottes. Hoping Lafayette was working. They hadn’t spoken in a while, but she knew she could always count on him, and him her. 

Tara walked into merlottes, the place was packed, she spotted her cousins head through the window. She only made it to the bar when, “Tara! hey.” Sam chimed from behind her, she turned around and flashed him a small smile. 

“Hey Sam.” She replied quietly. 

Sam nodded and approached her. “Listen, i know you don’t come ‘round here much anymore.. but you’re always welcome. We miss you.” 

There was a small silence between them before Tara just nodded and continued on her path to the kitchen. She appreciated Sam but wasn’t in the right mind for his sentiments at the moment. 

“Hookah!” Lafayette called out as he spotted Tara in the doorway of the kitchen, he sat a spatula down and opened his arms while smiling widely. “Thought you forgot about a bitch.” He half joked. 

Tara smiled as she made her way over to him, they hugged each other firmly before pulling away. “Hard to forget someone with such a loud ass mouth!” She teased, a grin plastering her lips. 

Her cousins eyes widened as he matched her grin. “Oh true?” He replied, cocking his hip sassily. “Well, people pay for this loud mouth honey!” He pretended to flick hair over his shoulder before turning back to the grill. “So how is you?” 

Tara rested on the bench beside him, watching him cook. “Confused, mostly.” She replied honestly, folding her arms across her chest. 

There was a comfortable silence as Lafayette waited for her to elaborate, when she didn’t he gave her a playful side-eye. “Well shit, me too if that’s where you is ending the conversation bitch.” 

The baby vampire chuckled breathily, smacking the back of his arm lightly. “Shut up LaLa.” She exhaled and chewed her inner lip. “It’s just... so hard to read people sometimes.” She admitted defeatedly, looking at the ground. 

Realisation sunk in that this was about Pam. After all his run-ins with the vampire, he knew she only had one side to her- and that was stone cold bitch. But he knew how Tara was feeling, not that she ever said it. “Shit, no one can read that bitch.” He muttered, serving food onto a plate and sitting it along the window that looked out onto the bar. “She an old dusty book nobody can reach.” He continued, trying to lighten the mood. 

Choosing to ignore his last comment, Tara nodded. “You’d think being her stupid fuckin’ progeny i’d have some sort of advantage.” 

A sadness danced within her words and it made Lafayette frown. 

Merlottes seemed to relax after their lunch rush, giving them time to have more of a deep and meaningful conversation. It was never really Tara’s thing, but then again, Tara didn’t feel like herself lately anyway. And Lafayette wasn’t just anybody. 

xxxxxxXXXXXXXxxxxxxxx

There was a knock at the office door, Pam rolled her eyes. “Ginger!” she pressed loudly. “I thought i said go fuckin’ home.” She yelled. Then the door swung open, revealing Eric. 

Pam gasped and rose out of her seat. “Eric.” She whispered. “I didn’t expect-“ 

The taller vampire cut her off, raising his hand. “Hello Pamela.” He said playfully, walking over to his progeny. “We need to talk.” 

Anxiety began swirling around inside of the blonde, these types of conversations never went well. “We are talking.” She retorted in annoyance. 

Eric sat on the couch, patting the spot beside him. 

Pam obediently sat but not without rolling her eyes and defensively folding her arms across her chest. “You’re not a fuckin’ therapist Eric.” She spat. “Spit it out.”

Her maker only curled his lips at her words, truth be told he always found her attacks comical. Especially when he knew she meant no harm, at least to him. But he could tell she wasn’t okay. In fact, Ginger wouldn’t stop gossiping when he was trying to feed from her. And he knew her well enough to know when something was bothering her. “Do you want to tell me?” He offered before continuing. “Or, am i going to tell you?” 

“Calm down riddler.” She teased, even though her face remained neutral. But she pursed her lips and remained quiet. 

A small sigh escaped Eric’s lips. “You can joke around all you like Pam, but i’m not leaving until this is sorted.” He stated seriously, resting his arms on his knees. 

Pam scoffed, shaking her head. “There is nothing to fuckin’ sort Eric.” She shifted in her seat slightly, looking away from him. 

Eric watched her closely for a few silent moments, which only pissed her off. And he knew it. “Okay! for fuck sakes.” She threw her hands up in the air defeatedly, turning to face her maker. “Congratulations Eric, things are fuckin’ shitty.” She barked, but her features contradicted her tone. She held a softer expression, her mouth almost pouting. 

“They don’t have to be,” He placated while reaching out and resting his hand on her shoulder reassuringly. 

The calmness in his tone, and the way he seemed too cool and collected made Pam’s blood boil. Things were always easier for him, he doesn’t have these childish problems. “Oh my god,” She breathed out dramatically, holding a hand to her chest. “Thank you for your wise words, father.” She bit sarcastically, rising from her seat. “Don’t fuckin’ patronise me Eric. You don’t even know what the fuck is goin on.” 

Eric glared at her. “Sit down, Pamela.” He commanded, watching as his progeny did as she was told, stubbornly of course, but did it none the less. “Now, i know more than you think and-“ 

Pam cut him off with a forced laugh. “You do? could’ve fooled me. You’re never fuckin’ here.” She shot daggers at him with her eyes, crimson starting to form along her waterline. “You’re never here.” She echoed, her hard exterior crumbling. 

This wasn’t just about Tara, he could see that now. Eric mentally chastised himself for not realising sooner. She was lonely. Lonely in every aspect. “I’m here now.” He placated, pulling her close. 

The blonde leaned into her maker, bringing a hand up to rest beside her face on his chest. A single blood tear making a path down her pale cheek. 

“You are a maker now,” He stated, stroking the back of her head. “Godricks blood is flowing freely through the three of us, we will not let him down.” He spoke calmly, almost soothingly.“Let her in. You can only teach so much from afar. You can only do so much from afar.” 

Pam nodded, wiping the tear from her cheek. “I don’t want to mess this up.” She replied in a hushed whisper, almost so quiet that if Eric didn’t have heightened senses he probably wouldn’t of heard her. 

Eric took in her words, there was a silent understanding between the two of them. Pam wasn’t referring to being a maker, they both knew this. He held her tightly against his chest as she continued to fight back tears. “It is a powerful thing you two hold, don’t waste it.” 

xxxxxxXXXXXXxxxxxxx

Walking into fangtasia Tara felt calmer than when she left, she was so full of rage, defeat and disappointment. 

After speaking with her cousin she had calmed down. It felt good to get things off her chest, things she was letting take over her mind. 

But glancing over at Pam’s office door, she remembered being practically kicked out of the office. It pained her because she didn’t want to be anywhere else but with Pam. There was a comfort in being by her side, being hers. Her progeny, her vampire,  hers . 

She grabbed a bottle of V from behind the bar and made her way to an empty booth, sitting in one of the corners. She didn’t mind closing days like these, the peace and quiet of the bar was calming and despite what other people would assume, it was comfortable. 

Eric had left a while ago, something to do with Sookie. Obviously Pam didn’t press for details, she couldn’t give less of a fuck about tinkerbell. 

But she had heard Tara come in from her office and was quickly checking herself over before making an appearance. 

Tara heard the door open, but she didn’t look. She sat the bottle of V down on the table before her and read the label. 

The older vampire strode over, slipping into the booth with Tara and sitting beside her. 

“Hey.” Pam pressed, looking at the ebony vampire who was intent on staring at the fowl bottle of blood in front of her. 

Tara was chewing her inner lip so much she pierced the skin a little before finally relaxing into her seat. She decided to speak. “I don’t have anything to say to you.” 

“Good. Because i want to do the talking.” Pam drawled calmly, reaching over and placing a hand over Tara’s pulling it into her lap before closing her other hand under it. 

This took Tara’s attention from the bottle of V, she turned her head to look at Pam’s hands holding left before looking up to meet the icy blue orbs staring at her intently. “I was unfair last night.” Pam continued, her thumb stroking the back of Tara’s hand. “And..” There was a pause, Pam inhaled an unnecessary breath. This was hard, she never had to really apologise before.. at least not apologise and mean it. “..I’m sorry.” She croaked. 

Pam’s words took Tara by surprise, she held onto her makers hands, finding comfort in her touch. “Don’t shut me out.” Tara pleaded softly, leaning to rest her head on Pam’s shoulder. 

The blonde reached up to stroke her fingers lightly over her progenys cheek. “Don’t leave me.” She replied. The feeling of being so vulnerable, so open.... it feared her to no end. But she meant everything she was saying. And, it didn’t feel as bad as she had initially thought. 

“You are my home.” Tara admitted, lifting her head to look into Pam’s eyes. 

Crimson danced along Pam’s eyes, causing her to look away abruptly. Tara caught her chin with her finger and turned Pam’s head so she was staring into her eyes again. A tear fell from Pam’s eye. 

Tara closed the gap and kissed Pam gently, reviling in the feeling of Pam kissing her back. They pulled away and rested their foreheads together, they stayed like that a while. In a comfortable silence. 


End file.
